Baby cried the day the circus came to town,
'Cause she didn't want parades just passing by her.
So she painted on a smile and took up with some clown,
While she danced without a net upon the wire.
I know a lot about her, 'cause you see,
Baby, is an awful lot like me.

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1. suddenly, it struck me that there's only about a week left before commontests. i am TOTALLY unprepared. like an insidious phantom, gripping my heart with fear, i had a slight panic attack the other day. poof. there go my dreams of BCDE grades. =) maybe i can still hope of attaining them, and more. (yeah, and that's if i don't sleep at all, 24/7 until the start of the term) mind you, i didn't specify the subjects in which i would get those grades in, thereby offering no room for surprise.

2. i never thought i'd like a blink182 song beyond repeating the track more than twice, but i miss you's haunting strings and goth mtv have me hooked. probably the closest thing they can ever get to a ballad, anyhow. refreshing change from a jangling of noise.

3. lime green and purple font look DAMN good together. zul is testament to that. -grin-

4. degZ is mine. stop insulting my taste, or whatever. it's better than the commercial brandname of a popular lubricant, a girlish variation of a giggle in onomatopoeic incarnations, the dubious half of the HSBT duo or an affectionate term for a male spouse prefixed with the only thing which the Prince and Pauper have in common. 2 and 4 together, could be an ironic dig back at myself and my fantasy possession, but that's as far as i'll go. the other two would definitely be an oddcouple. and that's cos you can't divide 1 and 3 by 2.

5. looks like Jedi Master's -finally- made an appearance on my blog. heh. not sure if that's a good thing or not. oh well, whatever.

6. after talking to lynn last night, i wonder if it's just me or if it's really a boy/girl difference. are boys all about being the best? are girls really that easily satisfied just with their little ya-ya sisterhood? and anyway, with the sense of competition, doesn't it bring to mind the alpha tendencies that all guys have (or should have)? that should prove that it's universal. why do we always want to clamber to the top? or maybe it's not so much that but rather the fall from grace, from somebody to nobody. perhaps that's something ken and i can share, after observing everyone i know. and maybe that could explain the similar sentiments we share. i don't know.

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Don't cry out loud,
Just keep it inside,
And learn how to hide your feelings.
Fly high and proud.
And if you should fall,
Remember you almost had it all.

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i've gotta be the biggest klutz on earth. in a scene accidentally reminiscent of theOddCouple, (focus on the word accident), i let slip a bowl of pasta onto the floor, and now i can empathise a 100% with the crew members who had to clean up the mess for those few times.

the irregularly-shaped shards scattered rudely on the floor. tiny fragments dotting the granite floor, adding to an already diverse landscape. red tomato sauce, like lava, splattered out with an epicentre of a volcanic mound of multicoloured pasta DNAhelix-shaped strands, that congeal into a hardened substance that sticks to the floor indignantly when you try to clean it.

my toe is bleeding.

streaks of crimson staining the floor, that eventually darken into shady maroon smudges, if one is not careful. and months later, you can still feel the gritty minute pieces under your feet as you walk over the site of the accident.

like a maid, i go down on my fours and scour the floor the way one would look frantically for a mishandled contact lens. the lights i turn on to illuminate that path of the corridor, glaring down at my misdeed, even as they betray the location of bits still visible to the naked eye. my mother is not around, and now i do what she did a year ago, when my brother made a glass table overturn, crashing onto the living-room, and taking away a part of our lives..

i am not hungry anymore.
quixoticka eulogized @ 10:27:00 pm