blah. computer died at -just- the right time, on saturday. how "lucky", especially during pw, when the only copy of the (p5 health education project) written report is on my computer.

so today terminator cuts my queue at the yongtaufoo store and goes in her usual slur, "hi michael.. let me go first ah.. i have pw lesson arrhhh" and i'm like fine. then after she hands in her bowl to the auntie, she suddenly pounces on me and asks me for the written report. and i said, "my computer died". and i can't believe i actually ever had to use such an excuse in my whole schooling life, because honestly it sounds very cheesy and fake.

then she retorted, "rj has so many computers that are alive" and i looked helplessly at lai who was next to me, and i said "yah but the only copy is on my computer" and i proceeded on to tell her it died on saturday and that i'd be getting it back today. then she pointed a finger menacingly at me and said "then tomorrow is the ultimate".

and after that she broke out from the whole terminator role and became the elderly lady afflicted with arthritis again, and said, "can you help me put the bowl?" whilst holding a tray.

oh, and as i was running to school yesterday for fear of being late i ran past her along the route from redhouse to backgate. and i breathed out a "good morning mrs lim" .. and then she was like "can you tell the woman not to close the gate and wait for me... i'm dying already" whilst brisk-walking.

'nuff said. pw must be so terrible it screws up the teachers too.

-----

some idiot nudged me violently on the train today, presumably because i was falling asleep and ending up leaning on his shoulder. but hello, you can tell me nicely. embarassment is a strong deterrent. not force.

and guess what, within 10 minutes, he was doing the same thing back to me. and what did i do? of course i nudged him back hardly. i wanted to stare at him before getting off, but too bad he alighted at simei. i burnt a hole into his back with my gaze, and this woman who saw me looked perturbed, but i couldn't care less.

it's bloody hypocritical la, that stupid man. there was an old man on the other side of me falling asleep too but i didn't nudge him. do unto others what you want others to do unto you.

and this weird man accosted me at tampines interchange asking me in chinese if i had thirty bucks, in chinese. i didn't break my stride.

what a rubbish day today has been.

i think i'm a goner for promos. gahhh. and here i am trying to make sure i dont get a Tgrade for PointlessWork. PracticallyWorthless. nonsense, all of it!

i think there is no room for love in my heart, but only lust in my loins. i cannot love. passion is powerful. sex is shortlived. if i got married i'd probably get divorced, max 5 years. don't get me wrong, i'm not a commitment-phobe. if i was, i wouldn't even have walked down the aisle and made the vow in the first place. i just cannot keep up with it anymore. novelty wears off. whoever the person is. i'm not interested in developing together with the person, but rather the initial process of getting to know the person and all their little quirks. and after you know everything, it becomes boring. you've seen it all.

and so i don't think i want to get married. but i want children. maybe i should just co-habit. and there'll be a jack russell lying at my feet. jack russels. reminds me of you. you and i who are both transient, in who we are. you probably couldn't last too, although i applaud your feat that lasted a decade. but.. once it starts, it all falls apart.

and i want to leave this place. immerse myself in totally new environs. i'm sick to the teeth of singaporeans and their myopic, narrow outlooks on life. hookup with an angmoh. and then maybe.. come back home 20 years later. ok this is mindless rambling.

and yes, i don't really appreciate private conversations on my turf in a language that i mostly don't understand, except for some familiar looking romanji. it's rather rude actually. the whole act of purposely speaking in an incomprehensible tongue just for the sake of flaunting it in people's faces that they are outsiders to some clandestinely, confidential thingamajig.

quixoticka eulogized @ 11:28:00 pm